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Student live tweets 3 hour Tutorial

Art by Lucinda Ly

Just Another Sleep Deprived Uni Student: @rip_rotunda2363 | 1:57 pm 

Do I have time to grab a mango magic from @boostjuiceoz before my tute? 

 

2:02 pm 

Turns out, I did not. 

 

2:04 pm

I should really invest in a shirt with ‘Shows up 10 minutes late to class with a Boost’ on the front 

 

2:06 pm 

If only classes still started 5 past the hour I would have been on time … 

 

2:09 pm 

For the love of God why did I put up my hand when the tutor asked who HADN’T done the reading 

 

2:10 pm 

He seemed so disappointed bc I was the only one who hadn’t I HAVE BROUGHT DISHONOUR 2 HIM AND DISHONOUR 2 THIS CLASS 

 

2:14 pm 

I’m gonna try to sparknotes this shit, hopefully there is a TLDR out there somewhere on this Marxist dissertation of the Great Gatsby 

 

2:19 pm 

Fuck nvm I’m just gonna try to do the reading in class 

 

2:20 pm 

Now to figure out how to download the pdf from moodle 

 

2:23 pm 

OMG I ACCIDENTALLY OPENED A TAB THAT AUTOPLAYED A YOUTUBE VIDEO ON FULL VOLUME AND PHYSICALLY FELT MY SOUL LEAVE MY BODY GOODBYE 

 

2:24 pm 

A MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR MY REPUTATION PLS 

 

2:26 pm 

I NEED TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY AND MAKE A NEW IDENTITY FOR MYSELF I NEED A FRESH START AWAY FROM THE JUDGEMENT 

 

2:27 pm 

OR RELEASE MY SIXTH STUDIO ALBUM ABOUT MY BAD REPUTATION #TSWIFT #REPRESENT 

 

2:34 pm 

IT HAS BEEN 10 MINUTES AND EVERYONE IS STILL SNEAKING GLANCES AT ME  

 

2:36 pm 

I finally managed to download the pdf despite eduroam failing to connect more times than my ex  

 

2:37 pm 

I could literally feel my brain whirring to a stop as I read the first sentence of this reading  

 

2:42 pm 

The more words I highlight on this pdf the more it looks like I understand the content right?  

 

3:23 pm 

May or may not have fallen asleep … 

 

3:25 pm 

Note to self: clear “Does sleep drooling on my hand count as a skincare routine?” from search history 

 

3:26 pm 

Note to self: invest in moisturizer to start said skincare routine 

 

3:34 pm 

I guess I might actually try to tune into the seminar I am paying good HECS for 

 

3:35 pm 

I hope no one noticed that I haven’t been paying attention for the past two hours … 

 

3:49 pm 

Wait, since when did we discuss psycholinguistics and child language acquisition in FUCKING AMERICAN LITERATURE 

 

3:51 pm 

Well I quite possibly have accidentally read the tute room for the one TOMORROW not TODAY … 

 

3:51 pm 

I aM a mEsS 

 

3:53 pm 

How did I only realise this 2 HOURS into the class 

 

3:54 pm 

Do I excuse myself to the bathroom 

 

3:54 pm 

Or do I just run out of here
 

3:56 pm 

I feel like I owe the tutor an explanation but what would I say  

 

3:57 pm 

Sorry sir, I appear to have gone to the wrong room. Why didn’t I realise till 2hrs of class went by? I would like to know that too 

 

3:58 pm 

Fuck I’m making a break for it 

 

3:59 pm 

Now to get from the 3rd floor of Menzies to the 7th  

 

4:01 pm 

Why isn’t the lift moving … 

 

4:02 pm 

FUCK I WENT IN THE EXPRESS ELEVATOR IT DOESN’T STOP AT FLOOR 7 LET ME OFF 

 

4:05 pm 

I made it just in time for the last hr of class DEYUUM 

 

4:05 pm 

#overachiever 

 

4:07 pm 

The tutor just gave me a dirty look for arriving so late but AT LEAST THE CORRECT TUTOR IS JUDGING MY POOR LIFE CHOICES NOW 

 

4:12 pm 

It’s week 10 and I am so far behind I can already feel the “your assignment is 327 days late” warnings flashing red at me on moodle 

 

4:14 pm 

Why is my stomach hurting all of a sudden, am I allergic to class? 

 

4:16 pm 

Simmer down stomach I need to at least get through ½ hr of the class I’m meant to be in … 

 

4:19 pm 

Can ppl hear my stomach noises they sound like the second coming of dory’s whale sounds in finding nemo 

 

4:19 pm 

Dream job would be paid voice acting a whale with only my stomach noises 

 

4:20 pm 

I wonder if that would be enough to pay off my uni debt 

 

4:23 pm 

Gahh my stomach pains are getting worse 

 

4:25 pm 

Maybe a dairy smoothie wasn’t such a good idea 

 

4:25 pm 

I love dairy tho 

 

4:26 pm 

Why was I not born with the ability to digest lactose at a functional rate? 

 

4:27 pm 

I was cursed 

 

4:31 pm 

Shit (pun intended) I think I’m actually gonna have to leave … 

 

4:32 pm 

I’ll just catch up with the tutorial slides on moodle if I stay here for much longer there will be a code brown for clean up on floor 7 

 

4:45 pm 

I AM SORRY TO THE NEXT PERSON WHO HAS TO USE THIS CUBICLE YOU HAVE MY SINCEREST APOLOGIES  

 

4:46 pm 

Is this what ppl who have just given birth feel like? 

 

4:47 pm 

Accomplished. 

 

4:47 pm 

And empty. 

 

4:48 pm 

Well that’s another 3hr tute that I won’t be getting attendance for 

 

4:49 pm
Could go for another mango magic tbh 

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