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Zoe Bartholomeusz

Giving Up

Words by Princess

Content Warning: discussions of existentialism

 

I give up
No, this time I failed.
I let myself down,
I know no-one cares but
I let them down.
I honestly,
Can’t do it anymore.
The feeling of never ending work,
It constantly hurts.
Being present is becoming harder.
I’m afraid of old habits, frightened of these
new ones.
Why does it feel like there’s no way out?
There’s shame in everything,
I can’t keep going like this.
I don’t know what I can do about it either.
Why,
Why do I do this to myself?
What went wrong in my perfect childhood?
For me to end up like this,
Can I not just have a normal life?
Can I not just enjoy like everyone else,
I’m aging and I have aged
But can I not just be a kid again?

 

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